I am one of maybe eight people who won't be seeing "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull." I can appreciate that the franchise is classic and groundbreaking, right up there with my beloved "Star Wars" ORIGINAL trilogy. But for some reason, I didn't bother seeing it when I was a kid. By the time I saw the first movie at age 30 (seriously), it was too late for me to be all that charmed or entertained by it. I've seen this happen before, like when people see SW for the first time as an adult and think, "Meh."
But even if I were stoked about this film, any joy I had would be crushed under the staggering weight of product tie-ins. Indy is friggin' everywhere. Cereal boxes. Burger King Kids' Meals. Soda cans. Lunchables boxes. I'm not buying half of this stuff; yet, I feel like I've seen Harrison Ford more in the last month than my own husband. A USA Today story describes how Mars Snackfoods took pains to create an M&M resembling Indiana Jones for its print ads.
Was "Iron Man" this bad?
Some of this is my own fault, because we occasionally watch TV. And when it's on Nickelodeon or the Disney Channel, there's an Indy onslaught roughly every 10 minutes. I've been lurching for the "off" button more frequently than usual, while telling my 8-year-old son (again) that he's not going to see it. Gotta admire his tenacity, though. (While we're on this subject, why are so many parents dumb enough to take their kids to a movie that is clearly rated PG-13? Yeah, the studios shouldn't so blatantly market this stuff to first-graders, but no one's forcing you to take them. Get a sitter!)
Would I be less annoyed by the marketing if I cared about the movie? Probably. And it's not like George Lucas or Steven Spielberg need my money. For the fans' sake, I hope the movie is good, and that they aren't left with nothing but a bag of limited-edition M&Ms.