Best Toy(s) Ever: Flip Wilson/Geraldine Talking Doll

Fourth in a series
The late Flip Wilson was the first cross-dresser I saw on TV. Wilson was the host of a popular variety show in the 1970s, and the best part of his act was his sassy, hair-flipping alter-ego, Geraldine. Naturally, this had to be put in (talking) plush doll form. On one side, you had the natty Flip. Turn the doll over, and you had Geraldine. But the real fun didn't start until you pulled the string to hear phrases like, "What you see is what you get, honey!" I pulled the string so much that it broke.

The Flip/Geraldine doll taught tolerance while annoying the living hell out of parents nationwide. Can any toy from the '80s make that claim? I think not.

Best Toy(s) Ever: Weebles

Third in a series
To appreciate the genius of Weebles, you need to know only one thing: They wobble, but they don't fall down. Maybe you couldn't get the damned Slinky to walk down the stairs or make Farrah roll on her little plastic skateboard, but Weebles were idiot-proof. The perfect toy. I'm guessing that many '70s stoner teens amused themselves with their younger siblings' Weeble sets.

Best Toy(s) Ever: Growing Up Skipper Doll

Part two of a series
The Growing Up Skipper Doll is one of those toys that has to be seen to be believed. Unfortunately, I didn't keep mine, and it is now an expensive collector's item. I'm so glad there is proof of its existence on YouTube, because my husband once doubted the veracity of my claim. Here's how it worked: When you got tired of flat-chested, tween Skipper, you just wound her arm in a circle and — Bam! — instant, pop-out boobs and a little extra height. I was only 7 at the time, so I was completely unaware that this doll was controversial. I'll have to ask my mom what she remembers about it, and what convinced her to buy me this cockamamie (but totally awesome) plaything.

Best Toy(s) Ever: Mego's Wonder Woman Doll

Part one of a series
Now that the millennials are all over the place, we're seeing a surge in nostalgia for '80s toys. Transformers. Smurfs. Lame. Everybody knows that the '70s were the best years for toys. There is no room for debate about this.

With Christmas approaching, it seems appropriate to pay tribute to the most awesome toys of my youth. My kids are all about the Wii and High School Musical crap, but they will never know the joys of items like the Mego Wonder Woman/Diana Prince doll. I played for hours with this thing, and I contend that it kicks Polly Pockets' ass.